.

Sometimes it feels like I'm running in place, going nowhere fast.

take me there.

I've got the urge to travel again. I thought I had lost it for good, had my fill...but it's come back again. Watching "Eat, Pray, Love" with the beautiful Julia Roberts was quite inspiring, as was attending a gorgeous Indian festival. I love different cultures and want to find a way to visit both India, and Italy.

 

Even if only for a short time...

I want there to be a season in my life when I believe this to be true.

blanket.

I hid under a blanket in the corner, away from Him.

I was ashamed, I was tired, and I was done.

The old familiar courtyard.

Blue tile.

I knew I should I come out, but I couldn't. I couldn't move.

Instead of chide me, instead of coax me to move...

With flashlight in hand He knelt to where I was...

and He climbed under the blanket with me.

And we just sat there in silence.

...under the blanket-tent...just me and Him - and the light.

It was exactly what I needed.

He always knows exactly what I need.

 

Oh, how He loves me so. 

I have to grit my teeth to not run away.

changes.

my whole world has been turned upside down

the beautiful thing...is that...

God has never felt so close.

and...I feel so, absolutely loved.

morning by morning

for some reason I am here.

maybe for finally forgetting what I needed to.

maybe for finding the burning inside me for foster children.

maybe to learn to be self-sufficient.

maybe to deepen my appreciation of familiar things.

maybe to have that conversation, give that hug, meet that person.

some days I wonder if what feels like a full on war is normal.

some days, like today, I wish to pack my bags and go home.

but where is home?

home is too many places in my heart, with no location.

In Him there is "no variableness, neither shadow of turning." {James 1:17}

Great is His faithfulness.

teen camp, round two.

I am so crazy about these kids.

It was such a grueling and exhausting week. Leading, meant stepping out more than I've ever had to, and dealing with a lot of responsibility...but being with these kids, was so worth it all.

I've never found something I feel so passionate about or
love so much.

I'm expecting great things, from a great God.

steadfast.

Today a really special lady reminded me that God cares about what I desire...and not just my fears.

I have a really hard time asking God for things I want.

I have a really hard time believing He won't hurt me

in the process.

What I long to discover in God is a hideway in His shadow.

Letting Him be my safe place.

Steadfast, but also, a place I live from.

.

I am afraid.

Afraid of what my heart wants.

But wanting to believe that "for such a time as this", I was created

No foolishness.

No empty dreams.

Nothing left to rot.

restless.

I've never been here before.