Sunday, September 6, 2009


Tomorrow I leave for Ireland. It doesn't seem real. But my heart is finally ready.

I know there are so many things God wants to teach me. So many places He wants to take me in His heart.

Last night I freaked out. I had a panic attack. I called home sobbing and I said, "Mum, what if God stops loving me?" It was an absurd fear that for a moment I had let control all rational thought.

God is constant. He is unlike anything we know. His love does not change, it does not just is.

God is beginning to break apart the tiny box I have had my relationship with Him crammed into. Today I felt His presence hanging about me. Today I felt secure.

1 comment:

Kate said...

i think that is the greatest part of a hurtful relationship. The part when you really come to grips with the realization that God will love you no matter what, and he is never going to leave.