Tuesday, June 15, 2010

the stinging truth.

I am sorry.

I was slapped in the face last night.

With the reality that I have used God to make much of myself.

In my blog posts, in my writings - "Do this, read this, listen to this, it's helped me become a better Christian - it will make you a better Christian..." What am I doing?

Am I just glorifying myself? "Look at what I'm doing, look at how I'm growing..."

How do I write anymore? What do I say? When does encouragement and sharing turn into self-directed praise? I feel like a complete fool. Ashamed, and humbled. My strivings and efforts are nothing if God is no longer present in them.

God forbid that I would mis-portray Him or make Him into what I want Him to be.

Here's the truth - I'm a completely reeking mess. Trying to learn how to love God. Trying to learn how to let God love me. And nine times out of ten, I get it horribly wrong.

I need to take time to re-evaluate my blogging.
re-evaluate a lot of things.


hbradford said...

I feel like we do this more than we will ever know. I'm with you here....

Love you, sister.

Anonymous said...

I think that everyone is a reeking mess whether they admit it or not. And most people are too lazy to do anything about it, me included. What you write about, and your spiritual journey, is inspiring. It is DEFINITELY helping motivate people.

It's so encouraging to see you write about strides forward in your faith.

GLB said...

thank you for your kind - and truthful words. I think you're right.